The Me book and My Autistic Reading

Last week, I read the ME book, Ivar Lovaas’s manual for parents on how to train a child through behavior modification. I even liveblogged my reactions to a set list of facebook friends. I’m going to compile those snippets here for everyone to see and read as they please, but I want to say something first.

I started out– and you’ll see this in my reactions, perhaps– with a flippant, how-bad-could-it-be, surely-I’ve-heard-worse attitude. Not to downplay the awful of the ME book, but surely I’ve seen some shit and it won’t affect me. Nothing affects me. I don’t emotions well.

But as you see in the increasing anger in my posts, it got to me. There’s something about reading a book designed to facilitate abuse, there’s something about this book, that just burns deep inside.


It reminds you that this is what they think is appropriate treatment. It reminds you that this is what they think we are. That every time they say “normal”, that is what they insist we are not.

Maybe I’m not normal. I am, however, human, with inherent rights despite these rights not being guaranteed by our current government (as evidenced by how ABA as defined by Lovaas is not only legal but insisted upon). I have a right to dignity and respect, the kind of respect that says “you and me, we’re both humans with feelings and pain and I will acknowledge that”. I have many other rights core to my being that go beyond that, but let’s focus on that one as we read my responses, because it’s that right that Lovaas blatantly disregards.

Anyways, my posts.

June 8 at 6:33pm ·

Touch nose
#MEbook
tuchnose

 

June 8 at 6:36pm ·

“As a result of following the programs presented in this book, the child does become more of a person”

Y’all, the preface admit we aren’t people until we play the right roles.

This is gonna be good. Can we really go downhill from here?

#MEbook

June 8 at 6:42pm ·

This book is talking a lot about how they view disabled children and adults. They say “different.” Why, then, are we not valid? I guess the phrase different, not less was not yet in the vernacular.

#MEbook

June 8 at 6:54pm ·

small notes not worthy of their own post:

We’ve already called disabled adults “child-like”

There’s a lot of worry about the stress of the parent, none yet for the child (page 4)

“If your child gets from 20 to 60 hours of one-on-one treatment a week, he will probably get as much instruction as he can handle” and we’re not aiming a little high? (page 4)

“have your child work for what he wants (…) no one has the right to be taken care of, no matter how retarded he is.” OKAY THEN (page 5)

“You are the boss (…) Almost all persons, including the retarded and especially the autistic and emotionally disturbed, want it differently (…) they may try to frighten you (…) they have no right to act bizarrely.” AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA no rights. (page 5)

TWO PAGES. TWO PAGES MADE OF PURE FUCKERY.

#MEbook

June 8 at 7:02pm ·

I had to get up to appease my fitbit, but, before I did, Lovaas was instructing parents to not let their kids get too fat like “many disabled people” who “look like big balloons”

(all under a subheading of “Begin by making the child’s appearance as normal as possible”)

FAT PEOPLE ARE NOT NORMAL, YOU SEE.

#MEbook

 

June 8 at 7:08pm ·

“It also contains a program for helping persons overcome echolalia”

overcome echolalia overcome echolalia overcome echolalia overcome echolalia

(page 6)

“Good luck!” SHOVE IT (page 7)

Oh wait that was all the introduction. Now the real hell begins.

#MEbook

June 8 at 7:18pm ·

Rewarding, ignoring, and punishing. Sounds legit… imately like dog training.

OH LOOK,
“(physical punishment) is a controversial process, capable of causing much harm if used incorrectly, but having benefits when properly used”
That’s chapter two. I bet chapter two is when the vodka floweth over.

^(page 11)

Oh look we’re using mundane fucken food as a reward. PORTIONS THE SIZE OF HALF A SUGAR CUBE, that’s not earning your gruel drop. Also sounds like a recipe for disordered eating but only people get to eat so *shrug*

The phrase “Stop behaving” was used. Not sure I have a comment on that because that would be Behaving and I have to stop now.

Oh neat, taking away a loved thing so that you can later reward it back.

“By being stingy (…) your child will work hard for (rewards) several hours a day”

NEXT CLASS, we’re moving on to “negatives” oh boy.

^(page 12)

#MEbook

 

June 8 at 7:25pm ·

Apparently if you abuse kids just a little it makes your love stronger.

Wat.

Now it’s talking about immediate rewarding. Because we don’t have attention spans, I presume. Neato.

^(page 13)

“Most children will eventually accept your rewards (and your being the boss) if you persist” …stockholm love.

^(page 14)

Oh look the bottom of page 15 is on “punishment” THIS WILL MAYBE MAKE ME DIE.

Will I die? Tune in next time, in like ten minutes, when I post AGAIN.

#MEbook

June 8 at 7:39pm ·

Aversives. I expected that. Spankings mentioned, yelling too. But surely this dude won’t stop there???

IT’S TELLING ME TO PRACTICE ON MY FRIENDS TO SEE HOW HARD TO HIT A CHILD. So yeah no he didn’t stop there.

it’s… saying to make them exercise as an aversive now.

Sir

you just said you don’t want them to be fat, but you’re going to make exercise a punishment? Holy bad associations batman. You’re already giving them an eating disorder.

…moving on! Isolation rooms. Yes good many ethics.

“we have heard of persons who have used time-out lasting for several hours or even all day. It is difficult to see how that could be of any benefit to the child” ANY BENEFIT??? LET’S DIG A LITTLE DEEPER?? Dude. That’s solitary confinement at that point of course there’s no benefit THEY’LL DEVELOP PTSD.

Oh. Addendum to earlier statement. Not only do we have our friends be spanking guinea pigs, but we should have them watch us spank our children “objectively”

Also it says to make your child feel apprehension. No comment.

Anyways Spanking Theatre aside, let’s overcorrect children. Because forcing them to do something they hate beyond reasonable give and take (like, you spilled a thing on purpose so you clean it up, that can be reasonable. You spilled a thing so clean the whole floor is what’s being suggested) isn’t going to build resentment and trauma at all.

Oh and while childo is slaving away, he can have no affection or friends. But also physically move their hands and limbs while correcting.

Only problem presented: “I mean you could be using that time to teach more normalcy amirite”

^(pages 17-18)

#MEbook

June 8 at 7:49pm ·

Oh shaping exercises, where you make a kid do something slowly and excruciatingly. The example used is “say mama”

I’ve seen that exact thing in action and it breaks goddamn hearts.

“tickle him to prompt his vocalization”

“He may not like it, but you do it anyway. If he resists you too much, try another kind of prompt, and if he still struggles against you, voice your disapproval over his resistance, and give him ample rewards for compliance” <— instruction for, I shit you not, making them play patty cake. PATTY CAKE PATTY CAKE, ASSAULT-YOUR-KID! MAKE HIM DO WHAT-EVER YOU BID!

^(page 20)

In other news, don’t talk to your kid like a human. Just bark dog commands at him. Like I guess “Patty Cake”

Like it straight up says, if you want them to point to “red”, don’t say “can you point to red?” like a decent person. Just say Red. “Red”

^(page 21)

And the next section is how to do it. Angeries rising.

#MEbook

June 8 at 7:58pm ·

Just kidding. “How to do it” is just a summary of the chapter, meaning it’s time for Physical Punishment.

“Parents project their failures onto their children, and punish them” Lovaas dude, you just summarized this book. Like. What.

Also it straight up says “It will seem totally inappropriate to many people to event suggest the use of physical punishment with developmentally disabled persons” um then why are you

oh apparently it’s okay if you’re recording the abuse,
transforming it into Empirical Abuse.

^(page 24)

Apparenty self harm is the same as “Self-stimulatory” (stimming) behaviors in that they both need to be punished. And are damaging.

OKAY, THE NEXT PAGE LITERALLY SAYS PHYSICAL PUNISHMENT. The mad is gonna happen. I feel like I’m being teased with a kick in the teeth.

^(page 25)

#MEbook

June 8 at 8:38pm ·

“if a child is very afraid of dogs, briefly (Show) him a picture of a dog”

TRIGGER YOUR KID.

“Use aversives that other parents in the community employ”

TRIGGER YOUR KID, FASHIONABLY.

“keep records”

TRIGGER YOUR KID, FASHIONABLY /EMPIRICALLY/

“this book (…) is about how to free your child”

THROUGHHHH TRIGGERS!

Apparently that’s it for physical punishment. Huh. Notmad.

Wait yes I am.

#MEbook

June 8 at 8:46pm ·

“Developmentally disabled children often throw tantrums when demands are placed on them” How odd I have never not once heard of neurotypical kids doing this no.

“it can go on for (…) literally years” a tantrum, that is. What the fuckening.

^(page 29)

“The tantrums become stronger if you give in” Abuse them harder until their frustration wraps around into quiet despair! See also: they’ll go away if you ignore them. Also spank them moar.

But also be on guard so that you don’t reward tantrums. Kids love tantrumming and want to do it MORE.

^(page 30)

Also it’s saying that tantrums are communication but that that’s bad. Because it’s just communicating “I want to control you”

^(page 31)

Up next is about stimming so I’m excited.

#MEbook

June 8 at 8:51pm

(paraphrase) “so we guess kids need to self-stimulate??? I mean so you can consider letting them do it if there are no other options”

“oh and you can harness it as a reward. Do that.”

“but otherwise they can’t do anything else while stimming so repress it for them. Restraint them! But not too much they might enjoy the stimulation of restraint and that’s a bad”

“Again, you can use stimming to make them do what you want. Whee!”

(End paraphrase)

^(pages 31-32)

#MEbook

June 8 at 9:02pm ·

Motivation!

when you’ve got a kid with no motivation (not like it’s DEPRESSION) you have to up the rewards and punishments! Like you know. Parental love. BUT MAKE IT QUICK AND SHORT.

Also it says to use a LOT more external motivation when a kid lacks intrinsic motivation and I’m pretty sure that’s bullshit, because IIRC extreme extrinsic motivation can actually decrease whatever instrinsic was there. It makes people reliant on the extrinsic motivation. Whereas, when you under-reward, it makes people go “did I really do (x behavior) for that wimpy reward? Huh. I must have actually wanted to”

But don’t let me get actual psychology in the way of abusing kids.

^(page 32)

Also apparently if a kid has anxiety about failing, don’t punish them for failing. Not because that’s shitty, but because they’re already punishing themselves. Feel free to abuse any other kids tho.

“We have sometimes tried to make the children very hungry and very anxious” ????????? “still they show some of the same attentional deficits”

YOU PUT A FUCKING CHILD IN CRISIS MODE AND WONDERED WHY HE COULDN’T COMPLY TO YOUR BULLSHIT?

^(page 33)

#MEbook

June 8 at 9:17pm ·

Talking about hyperfocus, blah blah kinda boring somehow not that evil. (page 34)

“Don’t reward the child when he gets the right answer with prompts present” I thought we didn’t want to confuse children???

Anyways it’s time to RECORD BEHAVIOR (abuse empirically, folks)

Oh my god it’s telling me to get a counter and a watch why are you making children into zoo exhibits, oh right we aren’t people we’re animals??? TAPE RECORDER NOW HOLY GOD.

(pages 38-40)

On to chapter 5.

#MEbook

June 8 at 9:27pm ·

SIT DOWN FOR THIS ONE, FOLKS, because it’s time to learn proper sitting. Did you know that being taught to sit teaches confidence? Who the hell would know that? What???

First, put a kid in front of a chair. Say “sit down” and then push them or place them into a chair. Reward them for sitting with the love and affection or food or water or whatever that they don’t just deserve!

Have child stand up. Pick them up if you gotta.

Now repeat. Push him less every time.

OH BOY IT GETS BETTER. If they get up before you say, “forcefully” (literally what it says) “place” (contradiction there?) him back into the chair so he become apprehensive.

Now it’s time to tell Child to stand up! Remember that “you decide when he shall sit down and when he shall stand up”

Also remember to open the tiny, rotted door on the front of your shriveled heart so that you can take in their tears and screams of protest. They sustain you. Evil shitbag.

Up next autistic family, we’re going to learn how to Sit Up Straight!

^(page 45-46)

#MEbook

June 8 at 9:29pm ·

Short break from “what the fuck even” theatre to note that I thought I made this drink strong, dammit. Numb my breaking heart.

Also I have trouble identifying emotions but my fitbit says I have a high heart rate so I guess I’m agitated, to say the least.

#MEbook

June 8 at 9:34pm ·

If you don’t sit up straight, you’re not attending. DAMN.

Kids need to know this so when they’re sitting, yell “BE STRAIGHT”* forcefully so the child knows “you mean business”
At that point!!! Sit up yourself and also physically move him. Probably forcefully, y’know.

If he /doesn’t/ sit straight, he’s totes being lazy or stubborn so “force him to sit up” so that he’d rather “get himself sitting properly” than, idk, have you manhandle him.

Praise warmly tho. It’s in the child abuse handbook after all. Cold treatment, warm praise, make a kiddo, suffer for dayz.

ANYWAYS THEN I READ THE NEXT SUBHEADING AND IT MIGHT BE TIME TO CRY.

^(page 46)

#MEbook

June 8 at 9:43pm ·

“HANDS QUIET”, the subheading reads. And I felt tears well because while I’ve never heard them directed at me, the ears of my dear friends have and it hurts, especially so, to see that one.

But I made a committment! So, a kid can’t hear you when he flaps because you’ve got ears in your palms and all that wind resistance… anyways. Let’s discuss what it means to have “hands quiet”. Their hands can be still and at their sides. Their hands can be flat on their legs. Their hands can be folded in their lap. Make sure it’s the quiet you like most!

Anyways, when the kid stims, yell “Hands Quiet”. But don’t stop there. Force them down! “into the desired position” Be forceful so they don’t enjoy it, like you apparently do, you sadistic fuck. Give them the food and approval (that they do not automatically deserve as human beings, which they are not) when they comply.

So, you’ll slowly be able to remove the force, because the fear of being assaulted on top of verbally abused will linger forever in their minds.

“Eventually you will barely have to move your hands at all for him to remember what the entire action is”

A little fear goes a long way.

Also, did you know that your child may tantrum, even though your requests are Simple and Reasonable???

^(pages 46 – 47)

#MEbook

June 8 at 9:44pm ·

Taking a short break. Feel physically pained by this shit.

#MEbook

June 8 at 10:03pm ·

Okay, back into the fray

#MEbook

June 8 at 10:12pm ·

Chapter 6: Directing and maintaining the child’s attention

Ohboy. So first off, eye contact. Gotta have that. Totally matters.

“LOOK AT ME”. Use this command to establish eye contact. But make sure kiddo can sit first. So that you can sit them down, say “look at me”. If they don’t respond in two seconds, look away before commanding again. Oh but also hold food in front of your eyes. That helps.

(page 49)

Be consistent, because unlike normal children, “slow children” don’t forgive mistakes.

(page 50)

And then it gets creepier, which was apparently possible.

#MEbook

June 8 at 10:20pm ·

“HUG ME”

Now that you’ve trained your inhuman monster of a “child” to fear the repercussions of not paying 100% of attention to you, you can force physical contact! Which isn’t a stepping stone for physical and sexual abuse at all, no.

Say “hug me” and then move them so your cheeks touch. This is apparently a Hug. ???? but I guess if you like normal and not cheek-grazing in your nonconsensual contact, you could command Child to “Squeeze harder” or put their arms around your neck.

(page 50)

SO YEAH NOW THAT YOU’RE ELIMINATING BOUNDARIES WHICH, lets be real, were never established to begin with, you can maintain the attention. You should expect tantrumming while abusing, I mean training, your child, but be firm and don’t let them get their way, despite the fact that we established in a prior chapter that this is communication, because you’re the boss and your ego could orbit the earth.

Fun fact “‘No’ has to sound like hell’s fury”. But only sometimes! You probably know what that sounds like because you are actually literally from hell.

Make sure your child is hungry when you’re trying to train him with food! And I quote, “this may sound cruel, but it really isn’t” Because he’s learning, and malnourished kids learn the bestest.

In the next post, we’ll eliminate disruptive behaviors.

(page 51)

#MEbook

June 8 at 10:29pm ·

Oh I’m sorry, the chapter is “Eliminating Mildly Disruptive Behaviors”. Mildly.

This is specifically about behaviors that are not physically dangerous. But they gotta go. Because, y’see, there are two reasons for Behaving. Avoiding a task or wanting attention, how very dare. SO VERY DARE that when they do a thing you don’t want, ignore them. Make them think you give zero shits about them, which you do, so it isn’t a lie. Do it so hard that you gaslight them over their own very existence.

The book says that this works because the child learns that the behavior garners no reaction, but I think that maybe that’s just what happens when you break a young soul down to dust. They just stop doing anything not asked of them.

BUT WHATEVER.

Remember. Mildly disruptive behaviors only! If he breaks furniture, punish him.

Time out works too! But don’t go over 20 minutes, because that would be cruel and inhuman, and disabled people are people after all…. HA! Got you. It doesn’t say that. It says to keep time out short because it shouldn’t cut into teaching time.

Also no time out if they self stimulate. Make them become calm while sitting perfectly still. Perfectly still. EARN YOUR GUMMI BEAR.

(page 54)

So we’re about to get into time out plus abuse. Whee!

#MEbook

June 8 at 10:36pm ·

Physical restraint! For when your child won’t stay still when standing in time out for (up to! We’re not monsters!) 20 minutes. For some weird reason. Probably because they’re evil. Not because they’re not programmed to be still for long. Not because nobody is. Evil. EVIL.

So anyways. Face your child to a corner. Pin his arms and, if he kicks, his legs to the wall. Hold him there until he stops struggling. This is uncomfortable, which is why it’s effective! Anyways when he quiets down (the nerve, protesting such kindness like he has rights) give him praise, to remind him that love is defined by and hinges upon physical violence. He may try to attack you, because maybe he has basic survival skills, so put him in the corner again. Repeat until you can return to your learning task, and do this again until you’ve done the task “to your satisfaction, not his”

HOW VERY DARE A CHILD PROTEST LITERAL ACTUAL ABUSE.

AUTISTIC KIDS CAN’T COMMUNICATE, except when they do to say “stop abusing me,” because that’s not earning your gummy.

(page 54)

#MEbook

June 8 at 10:42pm ·

You can make “No” more effective by slapping a table when you yell it.

Okay I’m gonna let real-me interject here, to say that adding physical shows of strength and power to loud, intimidating vocalizations is literally a tactic used by physical and sexual abusers to assert dominance and instill fear.

But you can also clap your hands in front of their face, for the record.

Also one of the behaviors used as an example is laughing. “no laughing!” because how dare you express joy in your sad, autistic life. *claps hands slaps table*

If he doesn’t cower under your show of strength and dominance, you can slap him. But only once. Sharp slaps to the thigh are also recommended!

Also sometimes the child will be rewarded by your anger. Actually no fuck you Lovaas, just because you’re a sadist doesn’t make your victims masochists.

AAAAND that’s it for unit 2. Whee.

(page 55)

#MEbook

June 8 at 10:50pm ·

Touch nose has been touched on now. As an example of things to teach your fun new non-human-entity to do.

At this point in your dog’s training, when it can sit up straight and look you in the eye, you can teach it commands like “Raise your arms” “clap your hands” “Smile” (BUT NO LAUGHING WITHOUT PERMISSION). First, make it mimic you. Raise your arms, have your bizarrely child-shaped dog raise his. (it’s not said but you probably force him to do this first!). After a while, you can just bark the order at him. Bark it, because he’s a dog.

(page 59)

And like a dog, we’re going to make him “imitate sounds and words so that he can learn to speak”. This is really hard, not because it’s unnatural for some people to vocalize things, but because, I don’t know, probably something about being awful and stubborn.

Later they’ll learn play skills. No, not those self-stimulatory behaviors they love so much. Play /skills/.

Altogether you might have to train your new puppy for 6 to 8 hours a day!

(page 60)

#MEbook

June 8 at 10:57pm ·

When teaching a child to raise arms, touch nose, etc. it’s not really about teaching those pointless things. It’s about obedience! Which they need. Because you’re the boss.

Also before you teach Touch Nose, be sure to suppress stimming so they think only of you. Eye contact too!

(page 61)

Also you might find that while you work hard to fix your broken child, she just sits there and SMILES. THE NERVE.

Here’s a good line: “your child will come to respect you as you acquire more control over him”

WE OUTLAWED CONTROLLING HUMANS, OKAY? Wait we’re not human oops.

Remember to keep a record of your child abuse for CPS to ignore because your child deserves it!

(page 62)

#MEbook

June 8 at 11:06pm ·

So let’s make Child raise their arms. Of course, you do it by physically moving their arms. Over and over and over and over and OVER AND OVER AND OVER.

Next we’ll teach Touching Nose because it’s so different from raising arms, except in that it’s pointless and boring. Tell them to mimic you while touching your nose and then when if raise their arms, yell (YELL) no and ignore them. If this terrible behavior continues, just make your child touch their nose. Such meaningful learning.

(Page 63)

Anyways next we’ll randomize whether it’s touch “Raise Arms” or “Touch Nose”! RAISE ARMS TOUCH NOSE RAISE ARMS TOUCH NOSE AAAA

(Page 64)

“Many disabled children have problems processing more than one cue simultaneously” therefor, make them focus on sitting perfectly still while doing a meaningless task.

Anyways you can also make a child clap their hands. In obedience. Never joy.

(page 65)

#MEbook

June 8 at 11:11pm ·

Tap nearby table Touch Knees Stand up Touch Head Touch tummy Touch teeth Touch elbow Pick up an object from table Stamp Feet Touch tongue Touch ears Wave “bye-bye” Touch shoulders Put arms out to side Touch eyelid Raise one arm Turn around (standing up)

That’s The Me Book’s list of pointless commands you can train your circus act I mean child to preform. Use your own ingenuity to add more!

Anyways we’re going to imitate faces now. Which is because, disabled children lack a “sense of self”. I mean, we think anyways??? Not like we can ask them. But you can make them pretend they have a sense of self by, say, teaching “Opening Mouth”. (spoiler alert, manually open their mouth)

(page 67)

#MEbook

June 8 at 11:19pm ·

Matching!

I match “ABA therapist” to “Child abuser” oop wait you say that’s wrong I have to touch nose?

aaaa make your child match stuff. MENIAL TASK UPON MENIAL TASK. And I mean. Yeah, I did matching in like, kindergarten. But I was allowed to smile during.

Don’t be wasting your time! Make your child attend for the whole 8 hour day.

(page 73)

Anyways matching is the same as Raise Arms Touch Nose. Do one first, then the second, then randomize, then feast your tainted soul on their gloom, repeat, etcetera.

(page 74)

“Many children enjoy the matching programs” (page 76) I’m not sure how we determine this because you disallow smiling and laughing and also I think once I was at this point I’d be so broken down as to not enjoy anything but also fake it for my cruel masters.

Anyways it talks about matching for 6 pages. Looks like I’ve been trained to do a boring and meaningless task– reading this book! doh ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

#MEbook

June 8 at 11:28pm ·

Chapter 10, following verbal instructions. “Give me a hug”

Oh wait your child already learned receptive language, you yelled Touch Nose at them ad infinitum. But your child is still undisciplined, so establish control over them! As thought you haven’t already wormed your tendrils into their entire sense of bodily autonomy. But kids like that apparently. They hate their “nonsense and crazy behavior,” deep down.

(page 81)

Raise Arms Touch Nose Raise Arms Raise Arms Raise Arms Touch Nose Raise Arms Touch Nose Raise Arms Touch Nose Touch Nose Touch Nose Raise Arms Touch Nose Throw Off The Shackles of Your Abuser’s Oppression Your Fear Is All That Binds You Except Actually The System Is Set Up For You To Fail Raise Arms Touch Nose.

(page 83)

Clap Hands Sit Down Stand Up.

(page 84)

Get Book Get Brush Get Glass

Guide the child’s hand to make him do what you want!

Turn On Light

(page 85)

#MEbook

June 8 at 11:37pm ·

Let’s teach children to show affection.

There are many concerns about teaching affection brought up. None are “isn’t it abusive to coerce a child into showing affection?”

Apparently they have to be taught affectionate behavior to know if they like it. Not that they have a choice, eh. Your needs and wants come first!

ANYWAYS throughout the entire day the child should be attending to you (presumably so you can demand affection at a whim). He gets no downtime. He may not stim.

(Page 86)

Apparently all of Lovaas’s victims grew to like him more. Sorry buddy, Stockholm syndrome doesn’t win me over.

Anyways kids are lazy, as evidenced by not wanting to raise arms. Yell at and spank them if you need. They might begin to tantrum, definitely because this is just how he deals with things and not because you’ve been breaking him down since his early years and that’s a normal human reaction to distress. No. *slaps table*

Also he may learn less because he’s stimminAUGH GOD FUCK I HOPE HELL EXISTS SO LOVAAS CAN BE BURNING THERE FOR ALL ETERNITY ALSO HE NEEDS TO SIT DOWN STAND UP TOUCH NOSE DIE AGAIN.

(page 87)

#MEbook

June 8 at 11:48pm ·

The task of teaching should be rewarding to you but your child has no feelings so meh.

(page 88)

So Lovaas alludes to sign language but, meh, let’s try abuse first! 2 to 3 months of it at least.

Apparently you just say “Talk” at them. Neat.

(page 90)

If for some reason saying “Talk” to a child doesn’t elicit a speech (on how you’re a fucking monster) you can tickle them until they vocalize out of desperation. Neat. This is a difficult task, so make food contingent on it. Also love.

(page 91)

Move your child’s mouth to make him vocalize right. This includes the tongue for “ah”.

(page 93)

Now child can say mama, so that you can convince yourself that despite years of torment, he still feels genuine love for you. Which, actually, he might, because the human brain is cruel like that.

(page 94)

So it looks like we’re just gonna brute force repetition of speech now. Neat.

(page 97)

#MEbook

June 8 at 11:58pm ·

So first, you teach a child that their pleasures are illegitimate.

Then you replace them with your own desires.

THERAPY.

Anyways, the next section teaches how to play with blocks. We shall make a basic childhood activity LEARNING and STRUCTURED FOR COMPLIANCE because we are MONSTERS.

(page 100)

Anyways, 100 pages down, I’m done for the night. I’m like, super upset and tired and somehow not drunk, not even tipsy,which might just be that I’m too upset to be inebriated. WHICH IS IMPRESSIVE.

I will continue at a slightly earlier time tomorrow. 5pm central. And I will finish this hellish book.

#MEbook

***

And that was the first 100 pages. I was basically wrecked after those four-ish hours. So you, go take a break, go cry and hit non-living things, and then come back for part 2, below.

 

June 9 

#MEbook

It begins again, very soon. It’d begin now but I’m eating taco bell and I don’t want to get cheese on the book. It’s from the library.

June 9 

Apparently you want a child to spontaneously build things with blocks that you taught them specifically to build. Yes, drone-child, do my bidding. First the blocks, then the world.

(page 100 continued)

“Do this” “Do as I do”
That’ll make Child pay attention. He knows force is the other option I guess. Conditioning!

“bring his toy play under your verbal control, so that you can just tell him what you want him to do with the blocks.” YES THIS IS DEFINITELY A PLAY SKILL

(page 101)

Lets practice “hand shaping” on ABA therapists.

*hand over hands their arms to flap*
“STOP STIMMING THAT’S NOT EARNING YOUR TOKEN.

(page 102)

“Your child is just like everybody else…”

Look! Your child is normal! Oh wait we’re talking about how they might be bad at some things.

“…in this respect” presumably, only.

Also disabled kiddos have a “plastic, rigid appearance”

Methinks Lovaas has been playing with barbies this whole time. At least that’s what I wanna think.

(page 103)

#MEbook

June 9 at 6:02pm

I definitely would enjoy copying a parent’s drawings ad infinitum. Definitely. Not boring at all.

Once they’re drawing their own pictures, you can command them to do such!

(page 104)

Oh shit we can make a child do our bidding when we’re not even present. Tell him to draw a flower and if he’s done it when you get back, yay! If not HOW VERY DARE DO A REPRIMAND. ESPECIALLY IF HE STIMS.

Kiddo is straight up not allowed to stim for more than 15 seconds.

(page 105)

Force your child to play like a sad robot that does only what you wish, instead of doing bizarre things, like rocking. Ew.

“Good playing”

Once your child has become used to a thing, limit her ability to use it! SIEZE THE MEANS OF FUN.

(page 106)

#MEbook

June 9 –:–

Brainwash your child! But you’ll probably do it empirically. So it’s fine.

Brainwash them to say “I don’t know” instead of icky echolalia

(151)

“No, no silly talk”

(152)

Sign language is only good when all else fails. Make them hurt first.

Also use it to force them to talk with their mouth parts.

And first they have to Sit Down Hands Quiet. Until you want to Hand Shape them, anyways.

(156)

Sign language is really effective! Should we focus on that? Nah.

(158)

#MEbook

 

June 9 at 7:30pm

“mommy” “nice mommy” so we teach them to lie.

(163)

“Your nose”
Never your feelings.

(173)

“Yes” and “No” are especially effective when you train which response you want.

(179)

Random rotation.

(180)

#MEbook

June 9

“his misbehavior is your jailer”

And you, his.

(187)

Take a child shopping somewhere small. “You want as few witnesses as possible”

Also take him outside to reprimand him. Have some class.

(188)

They might try to run. Don’t let them. They deserve their abuse.

“No! Don’t run away!”

(189)

#MEbook

 
June 9 at 7:39pm

“his misbehavior is your jailer”

And you, his.

(187)

Take a child shopping somewhere small. “You want as few witnesses as possible”

Also take him outside to reprimand him. Have some class.

(188)

They might try to run. Don’t let them. They deserve their abuse.

“No! Don’t run away!”

(189)

#MEbook

June 9 at 7:51pm

Did you know that Autistic children can experience feelings? Lovaas apparently didn’t.

(191)

“Some children show a great deal of unusual fears” like of you?

(192)

“The adult deserves affection”
The child deserves abuse.

(193)

“We have found developmentally disabled person to be markedly lacking in appropriate assertion skills” Yes why is little Timmy so afraid to speak up, he’s only been being Corner Treatment’d for having emotions for most of his life.

But basically you hurt a child until they tell you to stop in Your Words.

Now it’s describing how disabled kids will just kinda put up with torture and they’re all “BUT WHY???????”

(194)

Break them down to build them up just like you like.

#MEbook

June 9 · 

Children have fears to manipulate you.

Sometimes you can’t help them overcome a fear. That’s when you force it upon them.

(196)

Teach a child to pretend.
But she’s already imagining she’s somewhere else, anywhere else.

(199)

But they like playing teacher. Maybe we just like revenge.

(202)

5 pages of “games” but they’re all the same. Rinse Repeat.

(207)

#MEbook

June 9 · 

Surround your child with Normal Children in school. That way, they’ll emulate the Normal Children. Probably for fear of more abuse.

Also disabled kids don’t know how to free time.

(216)

(paraphrase) “Teachers might think your child has anxiety and that you’ve traumatized them with abuse” which would be correct, fuck off.

(217)

You can’t slap a kid while they’re in school, and that’s bad.

(224)

And a few dozen boring pages later, it’s over.

#MEbook

***

And that was that. I might put some deeper analysis into this awful book later, but it’s basically ~250 pages of how to torture children, and if you don’t see it as that you can fight me.

Or IDK stand up sit down go fuck yourself.

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4 thoughts on “The Me book and My Autistic Reading

    • Never read it, but I’ve heard of the term. And I SO believe it.

      Fun fact: one of my first activisms was against childism (I said Ageism, but I meant the kind against young folks). So I appreciate this comment. I feel like this sounds sarcastic and it’s not supposed to be oops.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. This is what the special ed programs that I went to were based on: compliance, reward and punishment. It lead to a stitton of internalized ableism and PTSD for me.

    Thank you for this. The world needs to know what going on to our children here.

    Like

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